Beer, Fireworks, and Rednecks!

Boy, I bet that title got your attention!

For many years, my family has gone to Portland, IN for fireworks. Small town, good atmosphere, GREAT fireworks.

For the past several years, we have parked beside a group of people that have made a day out of the festivities. They bring canopies, gas grills, food, and a few games. For the last two years, they have invited us to join in the games, such as "corn hole."

We laugh together, cheer each other on, and have a good time. Nice people.

They always are parked on our right as we face the fireworks.

The problem this year was to our left.

About 6 twentysomething certified redneck males, and two certified redneck twentysomething girls parked 3 spaces down from us. 15 feet or so.

Beer flowed freely. A lot too freely.

And, there were lots of fireworks. Lots.

I have never seen an idiot light bottle rockets straight out of his hand until last night. They are called "bottle" rockets for a reason! These dimwitted drunks were evidently oblivious to this fact.

I learned last night that when you light a bottle rocket in your hand, (1) you have a tendency to get burned, and (B)you have very little control over where said bottle rocket goes.

And, (d)I learned that drunk rednecks with bottle rockets have no apparent concern for children in the vicinity.

One bottle rocket hit the ground about 20 feet in front of these goons, and ricocheted right back at them. I must say that they made quite a scene ducking and running. Another rocket landed no more than 20 feet from some pre-teen girls.

And this was all before they brought out the cannon type fireworks-the ones that go KAAAWAUUMMPPPFFFF when you light them.

Thankfully, they only had three of them.

So, with beer in hand, they tried unsuccessfully to decapitate themselves.

After a while, all of that beer seemed to lull them into sleep, and thankfully, we heard precious little out of them while the actual fireworks show was going on.

We will park somewhere else next year.